Today I realised something. Something that will stay with me until the day I, sooner or later, die.
I will never make it.
See that guy on the front of the magazine? See your friend make enough money to take a few years off work? See that smile on your face in the mirror. That isn’t me.
I always wanted that to be me. I still do! I’m young, educated, healthy and live in a developed country. Why can’t I still make it? Because, it just isn’t in my nature. In fact, I know for a fact that it isn’t in nature of many people. It might not be in your nature to be rich, famous or even just well off. Some people work tirelessly, day after day, and never make it. Some are your teachers. Some are your parents. Some will be your children, no matter how hard you try to get them started in this world.
I was a kid that spent most of his time daydreaming of a world with constant humour, humanoids and freedom. I grew up in a world where I needed to study non-stop, to make sure I could operate to my fullest potential. When, there were kids outside playing sport. I was told that some of those kids would one day grow up to make a lot of money. Just by doing something as simple as kicking and throwing a ball? Some of them would fail miserably though, with no interest in their education and a sporting dedication, they would end up in a low-end labourious job, working their butt off to barely feed their own children one day.
I have worked my butt off and have made it all the way into my third year of University. I am in a great relationship, I hold a few jobs which call me on an alternating basis which allows me to, to an extent, pick and choose where I would like to work each week and how much I want to get paid. I have made mistakes getting here, and I can’t really say here is my ideal place to be. But I have paid for those mistakes, have learnt and have grown and made me the person I am today.
I am not sure how I well I will maintain this blog, as most of my other attempts at blogging have all fallen by the wayside. But those were just for fun. This one I am going to take seriously, to discuss my life, and to reach out to those who understand my situation and those of a million others. I wish I could network with people out there to make living a lot more easier, affordable and not so wound up in an endless frenzy of confusion, frustration and emptiness. My dream is get a better perspective of purpose, for others and myself. If you stumble across this blog and want to say something, reach out or just discuss an interest please feel free to email me, comment or link me to your website/blog. It will be great to hear from you!